It was tough to name only 20 of this year’s bumper crop of lovely ladies to the Top 20, but somehow we managed… For those that weren’t able to attend this year’s gaming expo and did not have the chance to talk to any of these lovely ladies, here are some facts:
* Every booth babe pictured here works for a modeling or talent agency. All of them, guys. They do NOT work for the game developers, publishers or PR firms, so for those of you dreaming of one day working alongside honeys like this, well, you’ll have to pay for the privilege (although, maybe that’s something you’re used to? …. AHEM!)
* Every one of them was more than happy to tell me at length about their uPComing catalog shoot/toilet bowl commercial/indie film/Maxim layout. I just nodded and tried to not drool down anyone’s chainmail/leather/rubberized/sequin tube-top.
* All seem to live in the LA area, so if that’s not incentive to move there than I don’t know WHAT is. Earthquakes be DAMNED I say!
* Number one complaint of booth babes: “Most of these guys really smell bad!”. I was sure to shower every morning and wear cologne. Every. Single. Day. Given the indescribable stench that wafted like an evil, toxic cloud from the Expo halls every afternoon as legions of sweating gamers toted their jumbo-sized bags of swag through the broiling heat, I take it that most of my fellow attendees did NOT follow the ladies’ advice. Oh well, I can’t say I minded it when the Ryl Girls clustered around me, pressing their leather-clad jumblies against me and whispered “Gosh.. you smell SO GOOD!” Oh, yeah, baby, so did you. So did you…
* No, I will not send anyone my large-sized master images, which are suitable for poster-sized enlargements. However, if a copy of World of Warcraft, Guild Wars or a coupon for the uPComing City of Villains beta were somehow to find it’s way to my doorstep with the sender’s return address on the package, well, then… =)
* We know, we know, we KNOW …we’re sexist pigs and should be ashamed of ourselves. Ashamed!! We’ve been so very, very bad. But, hey, WE didn’t flaunt acres of sparkling, sweaty skin in front of a crowd of tens of thousands of late-teen to early-20-something guys. So before you fire off an angry mail to me, keep that in mind. I’m just a humble journalist trying to make a living here!
(Oh, and if any of the honeys pictured below want a bit more free press, please feel free to email me your name, address, head shots, measurements and anything else you might have in the way of promotional items and I’ll be happy to add them here– ahem!).
And now, with no further delay, let’s bring on the babes!
The guys over at the Planetwide Games’ booth in Kentia Hall really pulled out all the stops this year, filling their booth with a veritable cornucopia of fleshy goodness. Judging amongst the lovely ladies constantly on display at the booth was quite impossible, and so as a tribute we offer up this humble photo montage. One word of caution, though, guys… Even though I swung past your booth about 10 times during the course of the show, I STILL HAVE NO FREAKING IDEA what your game is about whatsoever… I honestly don’t think I spent 3 consecutive seconds looking at anything but your booth babes’ luscious bods. If the idea was to play rock star for 3 days and hang with your paid harem, well then I bow to you, sirs. If, however, your goal was to sell your game, well, um… what game were you there to pimp again? I seem to have forgotten everything but the name (and how could I miss it, seeing as how it was boldly emblazoned on your models’ sparkly, quite-revealed poopers?