Because things are slow at work right now, and because I am sleep deprived, I will continue my gaze into the smiley future. However, I don't think this post will be anywhere near as creative as BCampbell's. I can only aspire.
In a few years, some celebrity is going to forego botox all together and get a permanent smile wire implanted in her mouth similar to the contraption Jack Nicholson used in Batman. I say the celebrity will be a "she" because females are the ones who start the fashion trends. It will probably be Nicole Kidman in her effort to halt the effects of aging. This prominent's celeb's usage of the smiley technology will spread across the country like wildfire, or seasonal allergies depending on the time of year. Or a Paris Hilton adult video. Anyway, orthodontists will become the new plastic surgeons as demand burgeons. That company that doesn't make a lot of the products you buy, but makes the products you buy better will streamline the production process of the smiley apparatus. An economic boom will hit the country as factories that manufacture the smiley spread like wildfire as well. Or like gossip about Brad and Angelina. AOL will enter into an enormous legal battle with a 73 year old retired programmer over the copyright of the term Smiley, which is officially adopted as the name of the technology. Bausch and Lamb the makers of Rayban will revolutionize the eyewear industry when they debut The Wink, an accessory to the Smiley in which the glasses are basically images of eyes, but one is winking. Maybelline, the make-up manufacturer, will produce the official blush to make the Blushyface Smiley. All will be going well until the Germans step in.
The indie culture company Flubergurdenhabernacht will stun the world by producing the first major competitor to the Smiley: the Frowney. The youth of the world, who are always looking to be pissed off about something, lap up the Frowney like cats and milk. Or Anna Nicole Smith and whatever the hell she's on. The appearance of the Frowney begins to segment the world into two populations. Families are divided as no other issue has ever done so before. Control of goverments become raging battlegrounds of Smileys and Frowneys. Unfortunately nobody understands a word anyone says because the apparatus prevents it. However, the clear look on people's faces deliniate what side they support. Lines are drawn in the sand and both sides make the most logical assumption open to them: they start producing mobile suits a la the Gundam series in fear of retaliation from the opposing faction. For the pilots of these mobile suits, both sides recruit clowns that are used to walking on stilts, believing that their experience will help them manuever the bipedal weapons. Because of this massive error in judgement, but refusal to admit it as so, the war between the Smileys and the Frowneys rages for decades. My clarevoyent abilities do not allow me to see the outcome, so alas I cannot make any money in Vegas by placing a huge bet now. Because you know that somewhere in Vegas, there is a bookie who has the odds on the future war between the Smileys and the Frowneys. You just know it.
In a few years, some celebrity is going to forego botox all together and get a permanent smile wire implanted in her mouth similar to the contraption Jack Nicholson used in Batman. I say the celebrity will be a "she" because females are the ones who start the fashion trends. It will probably be Nicole Kidman in her effort to halt the effects of aging. This prominent's celeb's usage of the smiley technology will spread across the country like wildfire, or seasonal allergies depending on the time of year. Or a Paris Hilton adult video. Anyway, orthodontists will become the new plastic surgeons as demand burgeons. That company that doesn't make a lot of the products you buy, but makes the products you buy better will streamline the production process of the smiley apparatus. An economic boom will hit the country as factories that manufacture the smiley spread like wildfire as well. Or like gossip about Brad and Angelina. AOL will enter into an enormous legal battle with a 73 year old retired programmer over the copyright of the term Smiley, which is officially adopted as the name of the technology. Bausch and Lamb the makers of Rayban will revolutionize the eyewear industry when they debut The Wink, an accessory to the Smiley in which the glasses are basically images of eyes, but one is winking. Maybelline, the make-up manufacturer, will produce the official blush to make the Blushyface Smiley. All will be going well until the Germans step in.
The indie culture company Flubergurdenhabernacht will stun the world by producing the first major competitor to the Smiley: the Frowney. The youth of the world, who are always looking to be pissed off about something, lap up the Frowney like cats and milk. Or Anna Nicole Smith and whatever the hell she's on. The appearance of the Frowney begins to segment the world into two populations. Families are divided as no other issue has ever done so before. Control of goverments become raging battlegrounds of Smileys and Frowneys. Unfortunately nobody understands a word anyone says because the apparatus prevents it. However, the clear look on people's faces deliniate what side they support. Lines are drawn in the sand and both sides make the most logical assumption open to them: they start producing mobile suits a la the Gundam series in fear of retaliation from the opposing faction. For the pilots of these mobile suits, both sides recruit clowns that are used to walking on stilts, believing that their experience will help them manuever the bipedal weapons. Because of this massive error in judgement, but refusal to admit it as so, the war between the Smileys and the Frowneys rages for decades. My clarevoyent abilities do not allow me to see the outcome, so alas I cannot make any money in Vegas by placing a huge bet now. Because you know that somewhere in Vegas, there is a bookie who has the odds on the future war between the Smileys and the Frowneys. You just know it.
