No, you silly person, the Wii is not a toaster!

[Meggo the Eggo]

Wow. Kotaku's finds never cease to amaze me.

The Japanese Super Safe Wii Safety Manual

And here are the "Lost Pages" from the safety manual:

Did the US Wii have a gigundus safety manual? Was it as hilarious as the one from Japan?

I'm going to go skydiving with a game console now. Peace out.

 

[spudlyff8fan]

We can't proposition a Wii to give us oral sex? It really does suck! (or doesn't it?)

 

[Grantastic85]

spudly you hating on the wii has been old for a long time..... you should stop now, and stop making your self look more stupid..... even though thats impossible.

 

[spudlyff8fan]

I don't think you understand the humor of that statement...

 

[Grantastic85]

I don't think you understand the humor of that statement...

nor do i even read about half of what people say...*sips more tea*

 

[wijg]

This post is a lie. My Wii drives me to work regularly. Allows me to get an extra half hour of sleep each night.

 

[DaveMack]

Sometimes i wake up and my Wii is sitting 2 inches infront of my face with it's little blue light on. I tried locking it in a closet, but there it is. I think it's really trying to kill me...